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Monday, August 4, 2008

Viking's Exotic Resort: An Island of Babes For Only $3,900?

At first glance, Viking's Exotic Resort sounds too good to be true.

Actually it sounds totally bogus - a tropical paradise with amazing weather, great food, and dozens of gorgeous women paid to spend time with you. But, as it turns out, this is no dreamland and it's got quite a list of well-paying customers.

Located in the British Virgin Islands, the company claims to be totally legit because it doesn't have to abide by those strict puritanical American laws disallowing 'island getaway sex tourism'. But if you were never a big fan of those, then strap on your Viking helmet and head over to their slightly NSFW website to make a reservation.

On the FAQ page you'll find one inquisitive observer asking, 'Who is in charge of this whole thing?', to which Viking Resorts offers this oddly cryptic reply:

The Principals behind this business worked previously in the fields of Investment management for top Swiss Private Banking Institutions. Bank secrecy and confidentiality have always been our everyday work. It goes without saying that the same practices are applied here.

I guess I can see that, because under the VIP package information a blurry-faced figure seems to be getting his money's worth in hotties while remaining in complete anonymity:

(is he wearing Dockers?)

Viking offers 3 different packages depending on your spending desires. The "standard package" starts at only $3,900 and includes:

  1. The company of the companions for 4 days and
    3 nights
  2. Accommodation in a Standard guest room
  3. All meals and drinks served at the villa
  4. Complimentary massages
  5. Transportation to and from the local airport
  6. VIP reception at the airport upon arrival
  7. Welcome Cocktail Party

For those unfamiliar with 'escort lingo', apparently the included 'adult entertainment' and 'companions' are referring to beautiful women who will engage in sexual intercourse with you. All of this is included in your package price, so there's no 'haggling'. Which sounds good, right? Plus, the whole situation is said to be 'pressure free', so if you just wanna hang out and chat with your 3 tropical companions for a few days, that's fair game as well. I'm sure it's the stunning intellectual banter you're looking for.

Then there is the 'executive package' which comes with a few more amenities for the bumped up price of $4,900. And then we're on to the VIP package for $5,900. But wait till you check out the 'Ultimate Fantasy Package', which is the only way to do one of these things, right?

For the cost of $7,900 for 4 days and 3 nights, you'll get all this:

  1. Two girls for each night of your entire stay
  2. Pre-selection of your favorite girls for the first night of your stay and/or "first pick" of your favorite girl or girls at the Welcome Cocktail Party.
  3. The company of the companions for 4 days and 3 nights
  4. Accommodation in a VIP Suite
  5. All meals and drinks served at the villa
  6. Complimentary massages
  7. Transportation to and from the local airport
  8. VIP reception at the airport upon arrival
  9. Welcome Cocktail Party
  10. Lifetime membership to our 'members only' section of the website

This seems like a great offer, and for a price comparable to any other island vacation where you aren't guaranteed to get laid, how could you pass it up?

According to the site, the girls are comprised of mainly Eastern European and South American models who are beautiful, charming, and personable. They also have a humble persona but a generous nature. If you catch what they mean!

This thing could go either one of two ways. It could either be heaven on earth, the most fun, exciting, vacation you ever take. Or it could be depressing and filled with douchebags taking advantage of impoverished young women. Does the 'CAT69' URL help its case for anyone? Any takers?

Let us know your opinion in the comments section.

Original here

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